Recently, Jeremy and I took a belated anniversary trip to Charleston, South Carolina. During that trip, we took several walks on the beach, the pier, the waterfront, etc. I was struck by the beauty of it all and snapped pictures like crazy! I even convinced Jeremy to let me take pictures, and I didn't hesitate when he asked to take some of me. Additionally, I had complete strangers take OUR picture...a rare treat!
After our trip to Charleston, we tried to show the kids pictures of our adventures, and we discovered our camera had vanished. We scoured the car, our house, our luggage, etc. I contacted nearby restaurants, security personnel, and even the police department near our last stop. Friends in the area selflessly went to search for the camera, but it was nowhere to be found. I was crushed. Completely devastated. Inconsolable.
Jeremy could not understand my overwhelming despair at the loss, and he reminded me calmly that it was "just" a camera and could be replaced, and that we still had the memories even though we didn't have the photos. He told me it was not worth the tears and the stress. What I couldn't explain to him was that those pictures represented so much more to me, for an abundance of reasons, some of which I will try to detail below.
1. For once, I was actually willingly "in the pictures." Usually I avoid pictures because I am appalled at what they show. All I can see in them is how tired, fat, ugly, or stressed I look. I usually can't see past those physical flaws to the soul within. On this trip, however, I ignored my fears and flaws and just delighted in the fact that Jeremy and I had some "couple" photos.
2. Those photos showed us having FUN. TOGETHER. Doing ADULT things. JUST US. As a mom, it is easy for me to forget what things I even enjoy. I get so caught up in what others need, want, or like, that I forget to take care of myself or do things I enjoy. These pictures were a reminder to me that I am more than "just" a mom, although that is a huge blessing in my life. In these pictures, I am reminded that I am someone's chosen life partner, someone's beloved, and someone worthwhile. Someone whose likes, dislikes, strengths, and weaknesses matter. The pictures would also serve as a reminder that Jeremy and I share a powerful friendship and can enjoy each other's company by just being together.
3. In this set of pictures, there were photos of things that caught MY eye or inspired ME. We took a bunch of pictures of a giant cargo ship that looked as if it could not possibly fit under the bridge it was rapidly approaching. We, along with quite a few other curious people, watched intently, unintentionally holding our collective breath. When the ship did, indeed, pass safely under the bridge with minimal clearance, we all simultaneously breathed a sigh of relief.
Jeremy teases me about taking "leaf" pictures, but I am fascinated by the way light plays through trees and branches, and I enjoy taking "off the beaten path" photos. On this trip, I had free rein of hte camera and could take whatever I chose. No one was yelling "look at me! Take MY picture! Look at that!" I could just enjoy and photograph.
4. These pictures represented how far I have come in life and how much GOD has blessed me. We went on a walking tour with my high school history teacher, Bill Stanton, and, at the end of the tour, Jeremy took our picture. Somewhere I have a "before" picture from graduation, and I can't wait to compare the two. When I had Mr. Stanton in class 20 years ago, it was a rough time in my life. We had just moved from LA (the only home I'd ever known) to TN. I didn't fit in at all in my new school, and I despised everything about it. It felt like a prison. The focus on academics was minimal, while wealth, parties, and athletics were glorified. I was placed in Mr. Stanton's class as a "last resort" due to how my credits transferred and due to our late registration in the system. Defeated, depressed, and dreading school, I began my tenure as his student.
Within a few classes, history became ALIVE to me. I couldn't wait to know more, and I proceeded to take every class Mr. Stanton offered during my time there. A love of history was born, and it has shaped me ever since.
Additionally, Mr. Stanton encouraged me greatly and did many things on my behalf, including reference letters. A few years later, I was admitted to Milligan College, where I received a sizable scholarship. Years later, an admission counselor confided in me that the reference letter from Mr. Stanton made the difference in which scholarship I got. Had I not received the one I did, I likely would not have been able to attend that school. Consequently, I would never have met my husband or had my two beautiful (albeit challenging) children. Perhaps I would never have learned the truth of and obeyed the gospel, met my church family, or received a million other blessings that resulted from meeting Jeremy. So, this picture 20 years later was more than "just" a picture. It was a visual stop on the road map of a blessed life.
All in all, this whole camera ordeal has been so much more than "just" a lost camera. I have learned and evaluated so many things just in these few weeks.
Yesterday, my son came in and said he deserved something nice. I turned to see why he said that, and there he stood with our camera. In disbelief, I just stood there. We previously had the same model of camera, so I didn't dare believe this was the one we had in Charleston. Yet, there it was! I quickly pulled out the memory card and opened up the files on our computer. It WAS our camera! All those pictures were there, just as I remembered them! I was so stunned and thankful that I just couldn't speak. What a blessing! I am so very thankful, and next time we are taking photos, I am undoubtedly getting IN the picture, exhaustion, no makeup, double chins, and all! :)
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